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Friday, June 3, 2022

Beliefs and Unbelief and Faith

I do not believe that Adam and Eve were historical people.  I do believe that Adam and Eve represent humanity as a whole, and that the story of the Garden of Eden, temptation, dissatisfaction with what God has given us and the resulting shame and expulsion from Paradise are all alegorical of what happens to the individual when we turn away from God in our ego-driven desire to "be" somebody.  I think the eternal truth of this story is to be content with what God has given, to be humble and honest, and to trust that God has already given us all we need for peace, joy, and love.  I also believe this story points to Jesus in how His incarnation, teaching, death, and resurrection represent our rebirth into paradise.  He showed us the way: die to self in order to be born to eternal life.  Kill the ego, and you can again live forever with God in paradise.  The way to do so is through following Jesus's teachings and example.

I do not believe that it only took God 6 days to create everything.  First of all, we have science not so we can ignore its findings, but so that it can help us better understand the wonderful works of God.  Second of all, time did not exist before God's creation of everything, and the way we measure time is based on our planet's revolving around the sun.  Until those two things were created and put into motion, time had not yet begun.  Finally, the point of the story is not how long it took, but that it was all orchestrated by God.  We are intentionally created in love.  

I believe that human evolution is a likely possibility, but that it in no way changes the meaning of the story of creation.  God created all manner of animals before finally creating humanity.  God made Adam out of clay but he didn't become a man until God breathed life into him.  God didn't breathe life into any of the other animals, yet they were still alive.  This must point to a different type of life - eternal life of the soul.  Humanity could've been evolving as God waited for the opportune moment in our evolution to breathe life into us, as it were.  I see it akin to God's breathing life into the embryo at some point in early development.  I know the official stance of the Church is that human life begins at conception, but seeing as a fertilized egg can split into identical twins (or more!) or two separate blastocysts can fuse into one embryo, it is hard to reconcile that there isn't some magical time period slightly after conception when God decides if this will be one person, two, or none at all.  But I digress.

I believe that Noah literally built an arc and gathered two of every wild animal onto it during the Great Flood.   Again, I believe the symbolism here is great.  Noah trusts God in the face of unlikely circumstances and when confronted with ridicule.  We should do likewise, when discerning God's will.  Trust God and do not question.  But actual discernment is key.  Not merely following a stock assumption.  Two of every kind of animal symbolizes God's concern not only for humanity but for all animal life.  The flood is symbolic of cleansing, as well as how something life-giving can also be life-destroying when not held withing proper bounds.

I believe Jesus was born to Mary and Joseph.  I don't think it matters where Mary got the sperm to conceive Jesus, or if he was conceived without sperm.  Spontaneous reproduction is possible in some other species, opening the conceivability of it in humans, even if only this one time.  But even if Joseph is the biological father, or if Mary was assaulted prior to her marriage, the point is only that Mary said yes to God, trusted in God, gave birth to Jesus and raised Him in such a way that He came to understand His mission and role in life.  The miracles surrounding Jesus's birth I think are symbolic.  I don't think it takes anything away from Jesus's divinity to say that he had a biological father.  Mystery is mystery, and Jesus is fully human and fully God.  I don't think it is our place to split hairs and try to describe or define how exactly that happened or what exactly that means.  

In the end, Christian Orthodoxy is about Christ.  Everything the Bible has to say must somehow inform Who Christ is and what our proper response ought to be to Christ.  How we get there is a matter of contention among people of various denominations and even within denominations.  The Tao Te Ching says "those who are good do not debate, those who debate are not good".  In other words, the point is not to squabble over technicalitites, as this only seeks to lift one over someone else, proving one is worthy.  The goal of the Christian life is to empty oneself of egotistic pride to make room for Christ.  We are to be the temples for the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.  The more time we focus on trying to understand things that are beyond our understanding, the less time we can devote to making room for God to live in us and through us.

Yesterday I learned this and that sin = darkness, emptiness, non-being - the very things I had been reading about as the goal (!) in Buddhist meditation.  Salvation is the dispelling of darkness with Christ's light, turning a dead person (non-beig) into a person alive in Christ!  In the universe, there is darkness.  Mostly darkness.  Darkness has to make room for the light to shine through.  The light would be imperceptible without the darkness.  The Tao Te Ching says that "being and non-being produce each other".  I have been denying Satan for a long time now.  In fact, I believe Satan was the first Christian teaching that I abandoned long before everything else started unraveling for me.  But as I think about the Orthodox view of salvation as healing, bringing back from spiritual death, and making room for God via emptying the self of sin through ascetic practices (not because these are in themselves good, but because they help us draw closer to God), it makes sense that Satan is the personification of all those things that lead to anihilism, the things that are actually pursued as the end goal by Buddhists!  The things that are accepted by secularists.  

Not me.  I believe life is eternal.  I always have.  When I started to try to figure out the proofs for it, that's when I started to get farther and farther away from God.  The way to God is not through reason.  Reason is one of the many faculties God has given us to help us on the spiritual journey, but it is not the boss.  Frankly, even Buddhists will agree to this!  If all there is of me after I die is that my body decomposes and serves as composted food for other living organisms, and my spirit dissolves into the ethersphere and rejoins energy as a whole (like a wave back into the ocean), then that is in no way any better than ceasing to exist altogethe at death.  And frankly, that just doesn't sound right to me, and I cannot deny my intution even if others want to call it illusions.  I'd rather live a peaceful, joyful life of illusion than parade around like a brick, stuck in my role of holding up a house and not seeing beyond my own reasoning abilities.  

If the study of science teaches us anything, it's that "there are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreampt of in your philosophy."  Even the Bard can weigh in on this.  See, truth is everywhere, not just in science, but in literature, and art, and poetry, and yes, religion.

I also learned yesterday that the Orthodox prioritize the truth, goodness, and beauty of God in a way that really resonates with me and is contrary to the secular West's perspective.  Orthodoxy starts with beauty, then moves to goodness, and ends up in truth.  Morality is kind of a non-issue.  We do good things not to earn God's love, but make room for God.  So whenever we fail, we just dust ourselves off and try again.  We all sin, so we do not judge others.  At least, that's the ideal.  And that's the point of religion, to give us an ideal, something to work towards, not a goal per se.  It's not about reaching that goal but about constantly working towards it.  

I started out worrying that without a literal understanding of Orthodoxy, I would not be welcomed in.  Now I am starting to see that the only person that can keep me from entering the Orthodox Church is myself!   "I believe, help my unbelief!" Mark 9:24

I am quite excited about reengaging with Jesus within the Orthodox church.  Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy! Amen.


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